Thursday (aka "Applause")

Something worked. Something about writing it out made it happen.

Yesterday I spent the better part of the day going through the many boxes of clothing swamping the area I call an office. (The "office" area, by the way, would be great if it wasn't, in actuality, so pathetic.)

I divided! I conquered! I even got rid of four of the eight boxes to neighbors the very next day. I am awesome!

(I am also going to politely ignore the next pile of Hoarders-Worthy Evil waiting for my attention. At least for tonight.)

Tuesday

The funny thing is, yesterday's post was supposed to be more than that. I wrote a bit and didn't like it so I cut most of it out, then something weird happened, I hit "post" by accident, and what you see is what was left. And it was perfect. Funny how things like that happen sometimes.

Today I have managed once again to completely ignore the boxes. The some-half-full-some-overflowing-and-some-empty boxes of little girl's clothes that I have to decide what to do with. But not tonight. My daughter is not settling down to sleep and is crying a little so I'm going to check on her.

Screw those boxes and their representation of clutter and indecision and guilt!

Monday

I've quickly managed to ignore the piles of boxes surrounding my desk.



(See photo #10- 10-on-10 )

What is this about?

My blog isn't about anything in particular except what strikes me as interesting or important at the time. I guess that is a valid type of blog in and of itself. But I haven't been able to figure out if I am that or more than that... if I will be able to write and maintain some kind of consistency. As it is, I don't tell anyone that I write a blog and I do nothing to promote myself. It's like I'm hiding out in the open. And this is because I just don't know why I'm doing this.

I used to keep journals, most of my young life and early adulthood. Writing helped me get out what I wanted to say whether it was acceptable or not. At first I used to self-edit by not writing exactly what I meant, or by using code or alluding to things instead of being direct. I look back and wonder why the heck didn't I just write what I meant!? Why did I only write the name of the boy that I had a crush on in fifth grade behind a heart sticker? In my locked diary. Talk about issues.

I became more honest in my young adulthood. It was much easier to put my feelings on paper. Mostly about how lonely I was and why didn't so-and-so feel anything back for me. Then I got married and "vented" to my journal. My husband was, unfortunately, the focus of my vents many times so I couldn't share it with him. It became too painful and eventually I fell away from writing at all.

(I then got really into scrapbooking. I loved framing my children's lives to look all lovely and beautiful. I found that quite satisfying. I would still do it today if I could fathom how I am going to catch up on eight years of my boys' lives. Plus the last 18 months of our baby girl's! Oy. I am nauseated just thinking about it.)

Eventually I was lured into the digital world and blogging. I can go back and edit my paragraph fifteen times before I publish it. Which takes me forever to publish a post. Which makes me not bother doing it at all. There has to be a better way! Maybe I can just let go of what it's "supposed" to be and just embrace what it is. Me. Blabbering. It's what I do best!!

So if you have come here because you are one of two friends I told about it, because you stumbled here by mistake ;), or because you are curious if this is an interior design blog, then I'm sorry but I cannot tell you what this is all about. Well... maybe this will help: The reason I chose "Bland to Grand" is that I wanted to transform from what I felt like I was at the time (bland/boring) to something that I felt I could be. Awesome. I've been working on that, inside and out, and I'm definitely making progress.

Another thing I can tell you is this is written by a woman who really wants one of the following things:

1. To make you laugh
2. To vent
3. To make you laugh when I vent

I prefer method number 3.

Consider yourself warned. If you stick around, Thank You, and if not, I shall (hopefully) never know the difference.

:)
Pam

10-10-10

I love this idea of "10 on 10" that I first learned about on this blog Trains, Tutus and Teatime. (I love Corinne's honest and lovely writing, and her pictures are authentic and adorable.)

Ten on Ten is a simple idea: "Take a photo every hour for ten consecutive hours on the tenth of each month. Document a day of your life and find beauty among the ordinary moments. Then share your beauty with us!"

I have missed the 10th of the month quite a few times and finally today, on the historical 10/10/10, I remembered! Only problem is... I didn't quite get it "right." It wasn't for ten consecutive hours because I started late and, honestly, forgot all about that part. But I did capture ten moments in the day so here they are for October 10th:

Click here to view these pictures larger

I will learn how to embed them next time. For now, they were supposed to be labeled as such:

1. shoes
I took E out for a bit in the morning.

2. breakfast
She loves her yogurt. Today mixed with sweet potatoes (which she also loves).

3. goodies
My leftovers after a pancake breakfast at the local firehouse.

4. lunchtime show and tell
E points to her big brother.

5. cards
D brought out the cards today. Haven't seen them in awhile.

6. goofy nuttiness
D goofing around with Grandma (or "Nana" to E).

7. fall leaves
I wanted to capture the deep blue sky contrasting with the bright colorful leaves on my neighbor's tree. I'll need to work on that.

8. pie
My FIL loves apple pie. I made him one on Friday and got a chance to bring it to him today.

9. diaper change
We are entering the difficult or wiggly stage of diaper changing. Tonight we got a laugh though.

10. mess
Today I moved this mess from my porch to my office space. No, I did not go through any of it before fighting my way to my laptop to write here tonight. Tomorrow is another day.

And another mess to clean up.


I hope you enjoyed viewing and I hope to remember next month! :)

bed time?

I think that my Ode to Night Owls has transformed me into someone else. Since school began two weeks ago I have gone from late-night-internet-addict to a very different in-bed-by-nine-thirty-Old-Lady. Going to bed that early is a first for me and the sad thing about it is that I like it. Ugh. It makes me throw up a little in my mouth just writing that. What happened to me? When did I become so old?!? That's what early bedtimes signify to me -- either a child or someone who is no longer youthful (i.e. OLD).

So when did I become old? It must have been this summer. No, strike that, I think it was when I had my daughter. I definitely felt old after that. But this summer as I tried new things like yoga and nia classes, I came to understand why women say that they weren't happy until their thirties. You know yourself better, your life is more settled, yada yada. Yeah, but it's true! I have settled... into the fact that I'm not cool and not a fresh new parent and I will never fit into those categories. So why try? I am who I am. For the first time in my life I'm becoming comfortable with that. I just never, EVER, thought that what I am... is a woman who enjoys going to bed early to get a full night's sleep.

Think about it. What have you discovered about yourself that surprises you?


edited to add:
And yes, I posted this at nearly midnight. One of my rebellious late nights, trying to recapture my youth I suppose. I will pay for this tomorrow. Oh yes, I will pay.

So much to write, so little time

I have been browsing a lot of new (to me) blogs lately. Between that and trying to enjoy the last weeks of summer I haven't gotten around to my own blog. There is so much I see and read that I want to share so I can't wait to devote more time to it. Until then, I hope everyone is enjoying the last days of vacation or the first days of school. I am eagerly awaiting my boys having more order in their lives, but not so much the early mornings! I have been so spoiled and I need to tweak my internal clock a bit so that I am not staying up until past midnight with a 6:30 alarm slapping me awake!

So here's to all the Night Owls out there who are adjusting to the school schedule again:
May we find moments during our hectic days for the things we crave to do in the quiet of the evening.
May we rest our weary heads on our pillows just a wee bit earlier every night.
And last but not least, May we discover a way to freeze time around us so that we don't actually have to change a thing. :P